Chinese New Year.

It's the time when you visit relatives you haven't seen for what seems like an eternity.

It's the time when these relatives comment on how you've grown/you're so big now/you look like your father/you look like your mother/you look like a cross between your father and mother (yeah, I should certainly hope so)/you don't look at all like your father and mother (thanks, so maybe there's something they haven't told me)/you look just like your brother (oh, help)/your sister looks exactly like you (they probably didn't notice that she's actually one head shorter than me, is fair and has rosy cheeks)/you're so pretty now (uh, right. SURE. She was an old lady who probably wasn't wearing her spectacles. Pity).

It's the time when you sit in the homes of these relatives, so bored that you peel your lips until they bleed (twice already in today alone).

It's the time you smile so much that your mouth becomes plastered in that upward turn of the lips.

It's the time you laze around in the living room and eat ten pineapple tarts, ten almond cookies, six kueh bang kits (however they're meant to be spelt, seriously), four butter cookies, five slices of kueh lapis, just after a full new year's dinner. Perfect. I need a slimming endorsement. Or maybe instant gratification from one of Mister Tan's physical conditioning sessions.

It's the time when you field questions about school, when quite honestly, that's the last thing you'd like to be focusing on.

It's the time when you're determined to stay awake at nights to enjoy family time or to slog it out at the study table trying to understand H2 Math, but end up falling asleep all over the place, in the most unglam positions for plain viewing by your younger boy cousins, who really find the picture of you lying on the couch with your mouth wide open pretty amusing.

It's the time when you take so many family photographs, you could almost compile an entire portfolio.

It's the time you discover new babies in certain households, then find out later that they're you're nieces and/or nephews. Mind you, it's quite scary when strange kids with drool hanging from their mouths are introduced as some sort of relation to you.

It's the time when I meet THE weirdest, gay dude to ever walk the face of this earth at one of my relative's houses. The one who forever has on him an insane amount of bling and who shares my name. Yes. That's the saddest part, and it never fails to shock me each year when I meet him and remember that tiny little fact, which I'm sure I'll conveniently forget till I next meet him.

It's the time when you feel lazy and piggish, and it really doesn't matter to you whether or not you put on ten kilograms or twenty.

It's the time when mom hates me for disliking bak kwa, because that means she has one extra thing to sin for. Bwahahahaha.

It's the time when you suddenly become that much richer - then become poorer again because you desperately need to fill up a Methodist Walk donation card. It sucks especially when your brother and cousins are ALL in Methodist schools. See, I didn't have this problem back in SC. Bah.

It's the time when I travel halfway across the island to go visiting - quite a drag, but I get to enjoy the long car rides, listening to beautiful songs on my iPod as the rain threatens to shatter the car windows... (the story of my iPod, lost and not found but somehow regained. A long, grandmother story, summarised: I love my parents).

It's the time when you park yourself on MSN and/or blogger, but you're actually supposed to be doing the GP worksheet that's secretly eyeing you as it lies there beside your laptop.

It's the time when family and friends come together and reunite; when all is forgiven and forgotten, and love and warmth fills the air.

It's the time when as much as the food is heavenly, the money is attractive and the break from work is welcomed with opened arms, what truly matters is family togetherness.

It's Chinese New Year. Enjoy it.